It used to be quite the laughing matter when someone was coerced into admitting that they had tried one of the various online dating services. It was viewed as, more or less, a last ditch effort, an act of desperation. I can still remember the day that I asked a friend of mine how he met his girlfriend and he said, with embarrassment, that he met her online. In recent years, however, online dating has really taken off and is becoming a very popular way to meet other singles. A combination of people being busier and the technological advances that make virtual communication easier have led to the rise in popularity of this once mocked activity. There are a lot of good things associated with online dating but there are also some dangers. I'd like to present a few tips for online dating that will help you in your quest to find Mr. Or Mrs. Right.
Be Specific
Don't be intentionally vague when it comes to what you are looking for or who you are. The more vague you are, the more people you will get responses from that you will wish you wouldn't get a response from. If you don't like short guys, say so. If you are looking for someone over 40, say so. When someone is looking through the different profiles and comes across yours, make sure that you have information in there that will allow him to evaluate whether or not he is interested. "I enjoy romance and fun people" is not going to cut it.
Be Optimistic
In doing a little research for this article I found an amazing number of profiles that said things like "I don't really think this will work, just wanted to see what happened", or "I'm only doing this because someone dared me to", or, and this was my personal favorite, "I can't find anyone to date where I live so I just figured I would try this out". Be positive in your description of yourself. Nobody wants to go out with someone who can't get a date anywhere else and nobody wants to feel like they are a part of something that is designed to give losers a second chance.
Be Patient
Just because you don't get five invitations on the first day that you log on doesn't mean that you will single for the rest of your life. Like everything else, this may take some time. Don't rush things.
Be Classy
If you put a profile up with pictures of you half naked and striking provocative poses, you probably are not going to get responses from genuinely interested, decent people. Don't talk about your sexual habits or fantasies. If sex between you and your partner is something that is going to happen, great, but let the details be worked out between the two of you in private, not out in public. You don't want to attract people who are trying to prey on someone they consider "easy".
Be Careful
Finally, be careful about what you say and do. We all know that it is not a good idea to put your social security number and mother's maiden name up as a part of your profile. It also is not a very good idea to post things like your street address and phone number. If you meet a stranger in person you would get to know them before telling them that kind of information and it is even more important to keep that information private in an online dating setting. Remember, everything that you put on that profile is available to anybody that wants to look at it. Start slowly and build trust. Chat online, then exchange numbers. Meet in a public place quite a few times before you invite a person to your home or go to theirs. Be safe and you will be happy.
And Finally…
Have fun! Online dating is a great way to meet people with similar lifestyles and interests. You will have the opportunity to meet people that will enrich your life in so many ways. And, not if you are lucky, but if you are wise, perhaps you will meet the one person who completes you and who is completed by you. And when people ask you how you met, you can tell them with no shame whatsoever, "We met online!"